Three MAJORS gone, three more to go and I am already feeling bored…..So, I guess I would rather update my blog. But there is nothing I can think of to write about……..u know where this is going……..another crap post……..lol…..
One of my good friends, Smit, recently proposed the theory that hitting oneself can sometimes give one immense pleasure…..Sounds sadistic but as it happens I also feel SOMETIMES, it may be true. Being a thorough-bred nerd, I wondered about the possibility of proving the theory and being awarded the Nobel for the same. So, I tried banging my head on the wall, but, alas! no pleasure, just a mild concussion. Idea dropped. Stockholm can wait….
But as luck would have it, checking out some blogs I regularly read, I found this perfect tag to hit myself in the virtual world and verify the theory. So, here it goes…..
Five MOST EMBARRASSING MOMENTS Of my life……(in random order)
- I guess this moment is rather ubiquitous in every guy’s life (or atleast of moronic sex-crazed guys like me). I was caught watching a porn by sister. Not exactly watching, actually. The CD was safely hidden in my study cupboard and my sis somehow found it and just out of curiosity, had a look (and my mom used to always complain that she didn’t have an inquisitive nature!!!). I was out hitting cricket shots outside completely unaware that at the very moment my reputation and image was going for a toss inside the house. So, when I come back home, she puts up this very innocent smile and asks me, “woh CD kiski hai?” Which CD? Suddenly I can’t feel my feet any longer. For the uninitiated, I have this GOD type image at home of being a rather studious bookish nerd and I get pampered like anything. So, I am all perspiring fearing a resounding lecture from her and all those she cared to tell. I just say, “nothing. it’s a game CD, sahil ki hai”. My mom comes into the room and the look on her face tells me they know the name of the game. Huh!!! for three days I couldn’t get myself to talk to either of them. Oh, I just remembered, this is what I told them. “yeh sahil ki hai. uske ghar paint ho raha hai so usne kaha kuchh din tu rakh le”. As LAME as it gets. lol……The sad part I hadn’t even watched the CD. Lessons learnt: Don’t keep such stuff at home if your sister is as inquisitive as mine. Secondly, pornography ain’t a good habit. Alas! I learnt it a little too late.
- Cut to October, 2007, Durga Puja. I am out with Mohua hopping ‘pujo pandals’, we are still just friends but slowly the spark is starting to build up. She is looking very pretty (as always) while I am rather awkwardly dressed (oblivious of the fact that Durga Puja is such a big festival). Anyways, it’s nearing midnight and I am feeling rather hungry, so we buy some stuff to eat. Her parents also join us. The festive mood is at its peak, everyone is in such high spirits, and well am loving it. Suddenly she asks me to bend down and says something in my ear. I am unable to comprehend her, what with all the din and all. I just think that she is making a funny quip about the rather fat uncle standing next to us and so I just give a dummy laugh. She again asks me to bend down and says a little louder this time, “tere trousers ki zip”. There is such an innocently wicked smile on her face. As if it wasn’t enough to be embarrassed for a lifetime, I again laughed out loud and said, “meri ya uncle ki??” And to see her guffawing out uncontrollably, while her parents look at us, trying to imagine what the boy (me) has said to make their girl go completely berserk, what wouldn’t have I given to have Harry Potter’s Nimbus2000 and fly away to Neverland. Anyways, I took out my mobile and pretending to talk to my mum, walked to a side and zipped up my nemesis (why the hell could it not wait……uska bhi time aana tha…..lol). Lessons learnt: always wear matching underpants!!!!
- November, 2008, Diwali. That’s not so long ago. So, I have gone home for the Diwali break and am putting up these little toony bulbs to decorate my home and our driver is helping me with it (actually its the other way round, I am the one helping). In one of the what they call it “ladi”, only half of the bulbs are working, my sister says, thats not looking good, remove it. But she doesn’t know her Nobel aspiring Engineer bro yet. So, I say, lets do this, cut the string in half and use the remaining bulbs. She is a bit skeptical, “will that work?”. “I am saying na, current flow hi toh hai, yahan se aayega aur fir yahan se waapas”. Well, I went ahead with the aforementioned plan and as I switched on the button, wham!!! the entire house becomes dark. As my mom shouts to ask what happened, I barely hear my driver saying, “ENGINEER”. lol.
- well, I guess lets leave this one……
- Well, there is a long list of minor incidents that come to my mind, like, doing a Salman khan (in Hum dil de chuke sanam- sameer….hawa ka jhonka) during dance class when I was 8, or blurting out how I hate the neighbourhood girl who had this big crush on me (thats what my sis tells me) without realizing her sister was sitting in the other room chatting with my sis, or being slapped smack on the face by the school principal in the morning assembly. Why? cuz I had not polished my shoes or something…….I know that was a little harsh. All right, mam, if you are reading and feel apologetic, I pardon you…..lol
Whoa!! that was embarrassing yet fun….for all you know I now have an evidence in support of the theory. If anyone of you find time (as if you have anything to do other than waiting for the Monday when Ekta starts spewing out fresh episodes), try doing this and tell me if you had fun. Don’t worry, I will give you a special mention in my Nobel acceptance speech…..
P.S. I started writing this on Sunday, thats why the title……..